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Our Hysterical Histrionics

We stand today at a crossroads: One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other leads to total extinction. Let us hope we have the wisdom to make the right choice. —Woody Allen

I love people who make people laugh. And if you’re really good at it, you might consider a career as a standup comedian. It’s an equal opportunity career accepting of all colors, sexual orientations, and physical characteristics, including obesity.

Obese comedians have a bit of an advantage- they can tell obese jokes. And they nearly all do. A skinny comedian telling a fat joke would be accused of ‘fat shaming,’ which isn’t funny. But fat comedians can tell jokes about overindulging and the size of their underwear and getting a seat on an airplane because they are talking about themselves. It is like they hold a mirror up to themselves and let us have a look.

Politicians are asked to stand up and talk about themselves too. But most are not comedians except by accident. And when one attempts to project onto others a subject they know all too much about in an attempt to manipulate my vote, it can all become quite hilarious. If you’ve taken to watching the news and reading some political punditry lately and it has you laughing to the point of choking, then you can perhaps relate to what I’m about to say.

What adds to the sense of hilarity is how these folks manage to keep a perfectly straight face when telling their jokes. Claiming to be in a state of deep fear, some even look pained when they claim the end of the world will occur if their party were to lose power. No wonder Hollywood loves these folks… they are wonderful actors.

This gentleman, a historian no less, claims the country will be done in by violence within a week of the election. Try to watch this without laughing (click here to watch) and then ponder as to whether he actually believes what he is saying.

I nearly up-chucked my last morsel of faux roast when told that ‘democracy’ was at stake unless a single party was to remain in power. And this was on a serious news show. What made it so uproariously funny was that I had just filled out my mail-in voting ballot just minutes before. If I get these comedians right, if I vote, I’m either voting for democracy, or I’m voting for tyranny and starving grandmas and unwanted babies and borders and cheap gas and maintaining a two-bathroom system and putting criminals into jail. Having nearly fallen out of my chair, I regain my composure and carefully eat my peas.

After six minutes of commercials for various political candidates, another TV pundit returns. She tells me that if her party loses, there will be a lot of blood. To prove her point, she refers to Washington, DC, on January 6. That was the violent storming of congressional buildings where the only death was that of an unarmed ex-marine. Apparently, our elected congressional folk weren’t up to defending ‘democracy’ as they hid, shaking in their locked offices.

She thinks she is filling me with the fear of God. I’m sorry, but I start to chuckle when I transpose the January 6, 2021 events with the events of the summer of 2020. I watched with you the burning and looting of cities to the destructive tune of billions of dollars. Thousands of businesses were torched. We watched grimly the news that over a thousand police officers either died or were seriously injured. Like Mr. Floyd, all of them were human beings and had families.

Sadly we even witnessed politicians, even one who would become our vice president, condone this violence as it fit their progressive agenda- defund police and neuter the criminal justice system. Those who rampaged our cities likely vote for these progressive candidates. Today they lecture me on the coming ‘violence’ if I vote the wrong way. My side is starting to hurt from splitting.

The irony is just so rich. But that is what a good comedian does. They take hypocrisy and human idiosyncrasies and turn them into a twisted reality that becomes hilarious. But sometimes the jokes get old. Like the one about starving little old ladies.

My grandmother must have been a young girl when she first heard that if you voted for the mean, kill your granny party, social security would be taken away, and her grandma would likely die a slow, painful death as she emaciates to nothing in her tiny bungalow (I’m kidding as there was no social security when my grandmother was a young girl). Then my mother heard it, too, during one contentious election cycle. I think she just laughed at the twit who said that on her black-and-white boob tube.

Sorry, that joke has lost its ‘fear’ rating. I give it a tired half chuckle and a thumbs down.

But what got me near blue from laughter was when these folks lectured me on freedom of speech. It, too, would be lost if I didn’t vote the right way. This is from the people who pitched a ‘Department of Disinformation’ to a rousing thud. This is from the people who colluded with all the social media companies to disallow discussion of the Wuhan virus's source or the vaccine's efficacy. Now, it appears the virus was leaked from a Wuhan lab financed by our own NIH, and the vaccine will not prevent you and I from getting COVID. My stomach is starting to hurt.

But I almost lost consciousness when I watched a news clip of a former presidential candidate. She had perfect comedic timing when she claimed that anyone who doubted the presidential election results of 2020 and is now running for office is not worthy of your vote. Yet, the digital historical cloud is full of videos of her telling anyone and everyone she lost to Donald Trump because he cheated! Her words, “Trump is an illegitimate president, and he knows it.”

The genius of a good comic is taking a mole hill and turning it into a mountain of hyperbole. It is mostly about exaggeration. Unfortunately, this hyperbole is about creating fear, and it comes from a place of desperation. But this fear will likely only take root in those already singing in the gender-neutral choir or what the comedians call ‘low information voters.’ Perhaps that is the intended audience.

Please vote- but not because of fear. Vote because you believe a candidate best represents your values. That is how a republic works, and it will continue to work as long as we do our part.

Unfortunately, we should expect a little election cheating. Passion and sin do that to people. Even Jacob was forever trying to cheat Esau out of things. First, it was Esau’s inheritance and then his father’s blessing. Finally, Esau had enough and gave Jacob a reason to fear for his life (Genesis 25). Cheating always has been- it’s the human way.

Have a great weekend.

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